Tuesday, November 26, 2013

The Holiday Blues Undone!

Dear Friends and Angels,

I can honestly tell you that I have been dreading this holiday season....this is the first season without my mom or my dad and I hate it. My perspective has been one of fear, not love.

In addition to hating and dreading, I have become full of expectations. I expected my friends to do this or do that for me so that I would not have to be alone. It was or is “all about me”...I had returned to a place where I was the center of my own Universe.

Somehow I am very blessed by my Creator...whenever my Universe becomes all about me, my Creator finds a way to kick my proverbial ass, and kick it hard! But in doing said kicking, I always learn something and grow spiritually by leaps and bounds even if I am bruised in the process.

Every plan I had for Thanksgiving fell apart and suddenly I was faced with either sitting home alone and feeling incredibly sorry for myself or I was going to have to go somewhere that I really did not want to go. Either choice, in my Universe, seemed to be some punishment and I fell further into my own self-imposed and created darkness.

I don't know why or how this really shifted but shifted, it did. Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with the idea that maybe this Thanksgiving was not about what others could give me, but what I could offer to others. A simple concept, but often I am far from simple when I can make something complex!

Instead of worrying about my day, I decided that I would seek out others who were alone and needed someone to brighten their day. I had heard someone who lost a six year old child (during a school shooting) say the following: “It is not about what we expect from life, but it is about what life expects from us.” Additionally, the mother of the six year old was asked what she advocates, such as gun control, etc. Her reply was this: “I advocate love.”


And with that, I will end this and remember to advocate love throughout this holiday season.

Friday, October 25, 2013

When You are Gripped with Fear

The other day, I was faced with having to do something that made me very fearful...I asked God and my spirit guides for direction and assistance...within seconds, I was told to find gratitude for the situation and replace my fear with this gratitude. I took the instruction and was AMAZED!!! Suddenly, the fear was gone and in its place was courage, acceptance and thanks. Try it!!! Let me know how it works for you.

What's My Lesson?

Recently, I was about to give someone unsolicited advice today. I had written my text and was ready to send it when my guides intervened!!! They have a habit of doing that! I then realized that this advice was going to interfere with two other peoples' journeys and that was NOT mine to do. 

I can walk beside you on your journey but I am NOT allowed to go behind you and push, nor am I allowed to go in front of you and pull. Your journey is YOUR journey and our journeys are always separate. This way, we can each learn what we came here to learn.

Namaste.

Defeating Pain

Hello all FB ANGELS!! Here is a little trick I use when I am in discomfort or outright pain! I remember that I am simply energy and form rather than substance (although I am taught to believe I am skeleton and muscle, I am instead vibration which my mind perceives as solid) ...consequently, as I focus on energy and my vibration, I realize that my pain subsides. I hope this is clear and if it isn't, just ask me to explain it further!

Reality...just what is it?

We, or more specifically scientists, are finding that what we have long thought was reality is instead simply our unique perception of reality; therefore, what we believe we see as reality is truly the magic of how our senses transmit electrical impulses through our brains so that these powerful computers can make sense of the stimuli. Much of what we believe to be real is from what others have told us and how our brain uses stored information to fill in gaps when necessary. Consequently reality may be more subjective than first thought.

Here is something to ponder then: what if the first humans only perceived that there were things to be feared in their relatively unknown world? What if there was never a lack of resources that required fighting over? What if there was always enough territory for plants, animals and all humans so nothing required domination?

How different would the world be today IF we perceived everything through the hearts and minds of unconditional love rather than abject fear? I believe we could wipe out poverty, war and disease immediately with this shift from fear to love

Contracts We Make

I have been working hard on unveiling and healing myself of the deepest wounds within. While doing this, I was blessed with one magnificent vision and a moment where that still small voice of my guides came through to teach me.

The first vision is me as a newborn. I am swaddled in brilliant light and love as I am held in my Creator's arms. It is when I realize I am truly a child born of this Creator- GOD.

Secondly, I remembered times as a very young child when my brother (only 15minths older) had to ride a bus to school. This was a school for children who, like my brother, had been diagnosed with cerebral palsy. I looked up to see my mom weeping as her first born child had to leave for school. My mom hated the school, but at the time, most public schools would not take children with any physical issues no matter how slight.

Right then as I dried her tears the best I could for my size, I made a covenant with myself: I would never cause my parents any pain if I could help it. This promise was kept to myself and caused many unnecessary issues later on.

My guides made it clear that I was not to make covenants with others UNLESS they know and agree to them. By trying to be so noble at age 3 or 4, I did not have the information necessary to realize the impact of my solo promise!

Pain is available to teach us so there is no way to prevent or escape it. It is how we deal with the fear of the pain as well as the pain that matters and helps our spirits grow.

I am thankful for all my lessons and gladly look to more.

Getting to Know Me

Over time, I have realized that most of my youth was spent trying desperately to please others in an effort to be loved. As I got older, I brought this pattern into adult relationships as well. 

Now I could go to counseling and I did...what I found out was that my parents loved me to the best of their abilities and any inability to love probably came from their own issues with their parents and how they grew up. I also learned about passive aggressiveness during these sessions.

In studying spirituality and healing, I learned that I could and must change the way I looked at things and in time, the things I looked at would change. This made a great deal of sense.

However, after the death of my dad (my mom passed in 1991), I realized that I had some very deep pain inside of me - this pain always came out as feeling that my family really never loved me UNLESS I was doing what they approved of. Deep, deep down, I was never loved unconditionally despite it all.

I tried to change my perceptions....I truly believe that I am a child of God and that is enough - or at least I understand this intellectually. Unfortunately, far down in my soul, I still have had incredibly pain and I cannot figure out why, if I am so loved by God, I just don't feel it.

Today I heard that still, small voice that is booming with wisdom! "You are loved unconditionally but you refuse to let anyone in to love you in this way."

WOW!!! Could it be that simple? Was I not allowing love in? The answer was clear...love IS unconditional but it must be allowed into the soul and heart to have an impact. Sometimes the answer is so simple, it is too hard to see!

Forgiveness Lessons

I continue to learn lessons of forgiveness. Forgiveness is NOT about the other person or about condoning something. Forgiveness is about freedom for yourself. When we forgive, we allow our bodies, our minds, and our spirits to be free from anger and fear...from there, we move into love which is healing and powerful. 

Recently, I also learned that forgiveness is about allowing another person or persons to make the choice to no longer have a relationship with me. For a long time, I believed that if I forgave someone and they forgave me, it was imperative that we continue a relationship. I could not understand someone no longer wanting to stay connected...after all, there was forgiveness, wasn't there?

Now I understand that true forgiveness means letting go when one or both of us needs to walk away. No one is required to remain connected. Being able to let go with love is perhaps the most healing and powerful journey we can undertake.

May all your days be blessed with love, healing and forgiveness when necessary.

Caught in My Grief

Today I received an invitation to a memorial service for all of us associated with the same hospice who assisted in caring for our loved ones before their passing. Upon reading the invite, I burst into tears thinking about my dad and my mom and how much I miss both of them. This caught me by surprise as I truly thought I was past the deep grief I had felt when my father first passed away ( my mom died in 1991 so I really thought I was healed from that )....

After a few minutes, I felt my divine connection with Spirit, God and my family. I realized that my mom, my dad and all those we love are NOT their bodies. They are, instead, infinite, loving spirits who will exist forever as one with me. I am never alone when I remember this.

My grief is for the human side of me that forgets we are more than our bodies. I remind myself to live in the present and always, always see life through love, not fear. From this perspective, all is as it is and should be.

How To Find A Healer/Spiritual Counselor

I am watching a 20/20 about a self help "guru" who was charged with homicide after conducting a vision quest and sweat lodge in Arizona. The participants who paid $10,000 for this experience were left alone in the dessert for 36 hours with no food, no water and no shelter! This was the vision quest...after this, participants were to endure a sweat lodge without any true supervision or understanding of the Native American beliefs and practices that are a true swart lodge experience. Some people died and others seriously injured.

As someone who works with others on spiritual journeys and healing, I say, use common sense! Talk with anyone who calls themselves a guru...ask questions as you would ask of a doctor or lawyer you were thinking of hiring. Make sure to do your homework and you feel that this person has integrity to be helping you on a journey that is truly intimate. Be comfortable with them and if you aren't, say so. Anyone worth their salt will take this as good and helpful information - they will not respond with ego.

Our spirits are precious and must be treated with love, care and protections they are not to be handed over to someone ever. Remember, YOU and God do the work...your healer or guide is just that - a guide, nothing more.

The journey to spirit is not easy but is should be undertaken with awe as well as caution. Move at your own pace and get ready for some truly amazing experiences!!

A Tribute to My Father

I realized recently that my brother and I did not post an obituary for my dad. After all, I had written my mom's obituary mainly to take some of my dad's pain away. My mom was a beautiful, brilliant actress and artist who never noticed how much attention she was getting! People loved her. My dad adored her. Animals thought she was Sow White! Women enjoyed being around her compassion, love, and wisdom. She was the greatest Mom to me. In addition, she had an accomplished career in stage, television and film. I was blessed to work with her in a stage production,a few years before she passed. I cherish this time we had.

In August 2011, i had tried to reach my dad but couldn't. I knew intuitively that something was not right.

I rushed over to his apartment where I found my dad in his chair unable to stand up. Although we don't have a perfect timetable for how his stroke happened, we do know he was home, safe and aware. When I found him, he smiled, spoke clearly to me and was even making jokes!!!

My father is truly an American success story. His father and mother were born and raised in Russia during the time Lenin was changing the entire world. It was clear to my grandfather that he would need to leave the Ukraine in order to avoid fighting against family. Both the Red and White armies were after him. After careful thought, my grandmother decided to remain in the Ukraine due to the fact that she had her first born son there. My grandfather would return shortly to get them out.

Unfortunately, no one counted on World War I breaking out. With my Grandfather here in Pittsburgh, my grandmother would have to wait seven long years before she could escape with her baby boy. They spent those years hiding in the hills and trees away from the fighting. Finally they joined my grandfather's brother (Uncle Pete) and made their way to freedom in the .U.S. My father was born ten months later!

My dad's only goal in his young life was to escape the coal mines and Pittsburgh...growing up, he delivered lunch to his dad in the mines!! At age 16, my father began college at the University of Pittsburgh. By age 21, he was a practicing dentist!! My father is very intelligent -I.e. genius and motivated.

After serving in World War II and the Korean War, he headed for sunshine and a new degree (surgery) in sunny California- More specifically Los Angeles. He set up practice near the Burbank Airport and Lockheed and then met a beautiful and successful actress. - my mom! Their dentist introduced them!

A little while later, they married and had a brand new baby boy (my brother). Sixteen months later, I came along.

I am truly blessed to have been the daughter of two beautiful beings. My parents were loving, wise and dedicated to leaving this world a better place by their thought, words and deeds. I miss them everyday but know they are always with me. I hope I have lived my life with the same dedication to love that they did.

A Visit From Beyond with a Message Not to be Missed!

Tonight I was very blessed to have a visit from my amazing dad. I did not realize this until he showed me that whenever I was mourning him and feeling so emotional about my loss, I was envisioning him as he was the last year and a half of his life - post stroke. Tonight he reminded me that I do not need to, nor should I, remember him in his broken human body as he is no longer in that state. Instead, I must "see" him as he always has been...whole, strong, and filled with God's love and light! This was the most incredible gift to me - he reminded me to once again "awaken to spirit".

When we remember, we awaken and live in the most awe inspiring space possible. May we all remember and awaken every moment of every day!

Why Can't We Believe We Are God's Treasures?

This is a common problem for so many of us: Why can we easily grant ourselves permission to be fearful, sad, or undeserving; yet, we find it so difficult to acknowledge just how phenomenal we are? We struggle to accept that we are truly amazing, infinite, powerful beings created in love but often readily accept that we are most of the time, not deserving and less than. Why?

The root of the problem begins in our minds from the day we are seen by the world as a separate being. We are told "no", "don't", "stop"....all these lead us to accept that we can't or shouldn't.

Our minds are the most powerful part of how we create, perceive, and experience reality; however, 95% of our thoughts today are exactly the same thoughts we had yesterday and the day before and so on and so on...you get the picture and it is framed in negativity.

For us to make radical changes in our lives and how we experience our present, we MUST change our thoughts! Our behavior will never change for good if we keep the same thoughts that created the behavior in the first place.

So, how do we change our thoughts? First we must become aware of them. Then we must identify which thoughts serve our greater good and which ones do not. We eliminate through practice those thoughts that reinforce negativity in our being. We replace them with new, more powerful thoughts based in love and acceptance. In doing this, we shift our energy because energy follows intent...but not just intent alone. Energy follows intent that is powered with strong emotion (now you know why most people always get what they don't want! Their intention toward the negative is powered with fear, anger, and lack of forgiveness. We practice this from day one!)

Their are some basic programs out there that teach us how to practice this shift: take away the aspect of addiction and The Twelve Steps are magical for anyone wanting to shift their experience. "A Course In Miracles" offers a workbook with 365 exercises ( one per day ) that can also help you shift.

Bottom line, it takes work....but the payoff is well worth it!!!  www.awakentospirit.co

Friday, May 31, 2013

THE POWER and WEAKNESS of FEAR

I have been trying like crazy to think of what I can write about after these last two crazy years...finally, it hit me and it is a subject about which I am passionate - FEAR!!!

When my dad had his stroke in August of 2011, I immediately reverted back to my old, fearful and controlling self.  I was determined to force the process of his recovery and in doing so, I not only made myself miserable, but I made everyone around me just as crazy.  I was absolutely surrounded by and operating from a place of deep fear.  

Obviously, this was understandable given the circumstances; however, by approaching the entire journey from fear, I was unable to receive or even know how to ask for the divine help and intervention that both my father and I needed.  My vibration was far to low.

Fear is a very stagnating place...when we are in fear, we vibrate at a very, very low energy.  Consequently, we cannot solve any problems which require a higher vibration for solution. Science (specifically quantum theory) has proven that we are not solid, but instead total energy which vibrates at changing levels.  Additionally, this same science has revealed that we cannot solve a problem from an energy lower or equal to the energy of that specific problem - we MUST seek a higher level of vibration in order to find the solution. 

Have you ever noticed that when you concentrate on a problem and stay in that problem, you end up only circling the problem, but rarely finding a solution to it?  However, when you get out of your own way and do something that raises your vibration and emotional state, you suddenly are "given" the solution to the problem...it is as if by magic that you receive the answer!

Recently, I have been having a terrible time sleeping through the night.  During my dad's illness, I became used to staying awake when he was awake and many times this would be throughout the night.  Over months, I began to change my rhythms and I established a pattern of sleeping only one or two hours here and there.  After dad died, this pattern has remained.  Everyone I know has had a big reaction to this and many have tried to convince me that I need medication for sleep.  I am not the kind of person who can safely use any medication even for a short while.  

Mainly, I could sense everyone's agitation over my not sleeping and I believe this agitation came about out of their own fears of becoming an insomniac as well!!  The point is, I had faith that I would find the answer to my sleeplessness as long as I asked for the answer and then allowed the answer to come.  I kept asking and asking but no solution.  This was very frustrating for me because I was convinced the answer was there but I could not see it.

Then the other day I was reading about Transcendental Meditation and I just knew that deep, deep down TM was a technique I needed to learn.  Although I have meditated for many years, I have never learned this method.  As soon as I became focused on my reading, I noticed a shift in my vibration.  I was raising my vibration significantly as I read and resonated with the technique of TM.  

I reached a place in my reading where the author stated that two sessions a day of TM was equivalent to getting an extra two full nights of sleep!!!  Suddenly, the answer I had been looking for found me!  I did not need to sleep more at night, but instead I should acquiesce to the sleeplessness and begin meditating two times a day instead.  This would make up for the lack of sleep! 

Basically, I had raised my vibration significantly and I let the PROBLEM go.  Once I got out of my own way, the answer found me! 

When I look back at my spiritual journey, I can safely say that ALL of my answers and solutions have come in this exact way.  As long as I do not freeze up with muscles clenched in fear, I am able to rise above the problem. This allows the solution to become clear, with virtually no effort on my part.

Overall, we are bombarded with messages of fear throughout our entire day.  It is nearly impossible to go a full day without being subjected to something that tells us we must be afraid and initiate a "fight or flight" response.  Even if we don't watch the news, nowadays almost every show on television demands that we see life as a battle.  

Very rarely do we see anything or hear anything that encourages us to have gratitude and raise our vibrations up to a higher level - after all, fear sells because it is such a powerful emotion.  Unfortunately, fear is also a very weak energy because it is such a low vibration. Very little gets solved when succumb to fear.  Moreover, we are likely to create more problems for ourselves if we approach life from a state of constant fear.

I leave you with this:

What would this world be like if we approached every day from a state of pure bliss and gratitude?  I won't answer this for you, but I hope that you will ponder the question and perhaps try an experiment where you change your own perspective and see how your world changes accordingly.  

Namaste my friends!