I Need Do Nothing

Lately I have been frustrated with a situation where others are failing to see MY desired outcome.  With their ineptitude, they have treated me unfairly and arrived at incredibly ridiculous conclusions!  My mind has been overwhelmed with this chatter.

I was working through my umpteenth revision of said problem when in a flash, there was stillness and I began to feel the presence of God.  I knew, in the moment, God was gazing at me hoping I would notice!

When I did pay attention, I felt this question from God:  "Why my beloved child are you so taken with convincing others when you only need trust in me?"

Within an instant, my frustration and obsession lifted - carried off where all ego based thoughts and actions go.  My entire being was filled with knowing that I need do nothing, but open myself to guidance from Creator!

Not Running

When I began seeking spiritual answers, I did so because my life seemed incredibly painful and in the depths of my soul, I knew there had to be a better way...Essentially, though I believe I was running from my pain.

Today, I have cone full circle in that I know I can experience grief, anger, pain with the understanding that these emotions are not in themselves bad, but instead are an indication that I am alive and able to feel everything without judgment assigned.

All emotions are an invitation to know oneself as the Essential Self - alive!  I find the Heart of Myself in these moments.

Non resistance

"Enlightenment could be defined as the absence of resistance to what is, the total intimacy with whatever is taking place without any desire to reject or replace it; so intimate that there is no room for a self to separate itself out from the whole."
     ~Rupert Spira

Yesterday, this Lesson came to me in no uncertain terms!

I learned as a child to behave in certain ways to assure an outcome which felt safe to me.  

As an adult who desires to be more spontaneous and recognizes that no outcome is always assured, this behavior no longer serves me - even the thoughts behind the action require understanding, forgiveness and release.

I have learned to replace control with faith....a faith in a greater intelligence that desires the absolute best for me.  In this process, I am free to see and acknowledge that often the journey is more telling than the destination.

Serenity

"At the head of all understanding – is realizing what is and what cannot be, and the consoling of what is not in our power to change.”

Solomon ibn Gabirol

Changing My World

Here is why I do not engage in politics:

Pointing my finger outwards towards people, places and things will NEVER fundamentally change my reality or the reality of the players in my world.

Only looking within, forgiving everyone and everything until I am only that which is infinitely pure and whole can truly alter the "outside" world because at that moment, my perspective will now be in line with Source.

Anything less than this is a half measure and unacceptable.

- After writing the above, someone commented that I should not diminish the strides political activism has made...my response:

I wrote something, but erased it because it didn't really capture my point.  There is nothing to my world except my perception of it.  (Same with you...everything and everyone in your world is based on your perception.).

If I align my vision only with Absolute Pure Infinite Love (Creator/Source/God/Consciousness) then my perspective radically shifts to one which no longer sees imperfection at all.

At this point, in my world, there is no longer a need for politics, judgment, anger, fear...etc., because anything not in line with my above defined vision cannot exist.

Simple - yes!  Easy - no.  But I will continue this path until I achieve this state of being.

- Someone questioned how I could just ignore getting punched in the face.  My response was this:

What I do say, and I was clear this is for MY path, that I can only make significant changes in MY world by changing how I perceive the world completely!  This is a working process, a rigorous, but exciting journey...not just pie in the sky hoping that I just won't get punched in the face by smiling at everyone!

No...this is questioning EVERYTHING I have been taught by people and experiences outside of myself...finding a different way of seeing, perceiving and eventually experiencing these things then using forgiveness to the ultimate degree to move away from ALL fear, anger, judgment, etc.

As I do this, my challenge is to become Absolute Pure Infinite Awareness (Love or Beauty) which by definition has NO opposites.  At this moment of transition, everything is unified into perfection.

My Time with Angels

One day many years ago, I arrived home from work and realized there was enough light left in the day to ride to Griffith Park, loop around it and come home.  I got dressed, put on my helmet and set off.

At the second major intersection, I had a full green light with no traffic so I started across...suddenly, I heard the sharp squeal of tires burning against pavement.  I looked up to see a car coming straight for me and within a nanosecond I knew they were aiming to hit me on purpose!

Something within me told me I would not survive the impact.  I let go.  I mean I really surrendered with only one thought, "Please God, don't let it hurt."  

Then nothing.  Time stopped.

THUMP! The car hit me - not the bike, but me, straight on.  I flew up into the air.

Suddenly, I felt the softest hand take my left shoulder and another hand take my right.  As if I were nothing but a feather, these two hands, which by now I knew were two Angels, lifted me ever so gently into the air and placed me oh, so softly on the ground!

Sprawled on my back on the pavement, I looked up into the faces of two men who laughed at the job they had done and screamed off into the evening!  Several cars followed them, believing they had intentionally murdered me - after all, no one could have survived that hit.

I was taken to the hospital.  I had only one puncture would on my lower leg and some sore muscles.  The police never pursued the men and the car they were driving was stolen.

I was alive!  The bike was not, but I was!

I was more alive than I had been because I knew unequivocally that my Angels were real and were constantly protecting me.

A Strange and Wonderful Journey

Many years ago when I was beginning my spiritual journey of discovery, I was graced with meeting with two very powerful women who could work with energy and "hold space".

Because they were so strong, I knew I could work with them and not hold back my own energy - my energy was powerful, but I knew it would never overwhelm them.

I was having some trouble controlling the power of my energy that came from my solar plexus.  I found that there were times when I could physically push people away just with this energy.  I needed to understand more about this and how to use it properly.

I worked first with one woman at her house, and then after a couple of hours, her friend appeared...we were taking a tour of the house which was built by my friend's father on Mt. Washington in the Los Angeles area.  This location has extremely powerful energy in its own right and there is also a spiritual center located there.

We were completing the tour when suddenly I felt the most intense pain go through my throat, chest and solar plexus.  I could barely remain standing.  I tried to breathe through it and relax, but the pain was so severe - my mother had passed away at age sixty from a heart attack while she slept. Her brother had died at age forty-five from the same, so of course I was worried - actually downright afraid.

My friends could  see this was something big, so they asked me if they could help from an energy standpoint.  "YES!" I gasped.  I stood up and had one friend in front of me and the other woman at my back with her hand between my shoulder blades.  I closed my eyes.

First, I was in total darkness. I seemed to be stuck or held in place...nothing could move.

My friend in front of me realized she was blocking the energy from flowing freely, so she got up and moved slightly - Everything opened up!

Whoosh!  Suddenly, although still in complete darkness, I knew I was spirit only, but now I could feel my mother's spirit.  Her essence was literally wrapped around my spirit holding and protecting me!

As I listened, I could hear the voice of Mother Craddock (my mom's great-grandmother - she adored my mom)!  She was calling my mom by her nickname, "Dinny".  "Dinny, she is safe now.  She has found her way, you can let her go and she will be protected."  My mom took a few beats.  The pain in my chest was crushing me.

After that moment, my mom released me and moved into the arms of her beloved great-grandmother.  The pain was gone!  I expanded.

My mom, Mother Craddock and I said our good-byes and I thanked my mom for making sure I found my path and was safe!  They moved on into light.  I opened my eyes and I knew I had been totally transformed!

My friends talked with me for quite some time after that.  I noticed they were staring at my face!  At the same time, they both exclaimed that I looked different physically. They assured me I was fine, but told me not to be surprised if I saw the change when I looked in the mirror!

I wasn't worried... something major had shifted within me.  After this experience, I had a full understanding of something that had bothered me from the moment my mother had died - I could not feel her outside of me!  I always thought I should sense her presence near me; of course, I had no idea that all this time she had literally been One with me!  In fact, someone I highly respect talks about this experience as an expression of Oneness - that is very accurate.

I changed dramatically that day and ever since...I walk my path with the Angels, Jesus and God directing me.  I know death is only a doorway into another dimension.   Since that day, I have been blessed to have many occurrences of epiphanies and miracles occur in my life.

This is a strange, but wonderful journey we walk!